i went to the bookstore today to lick my wounds with words of healing. after almost three hours of desperate browsing, i finally decided on the bible (yes, the bible since i need a new one as i can't understand the version i have), a prayerbook for everyday women, a book from Paolo Coehlo, two self-help books and a women's magazine...so far the biggest bookstore splurge of my life.
on my way to the counter, i saw a college friend and greeted her.
Candz, okay ka lang? Pumayat ka ah..
i then blurted out that i just broke up with my boyfriend and excused myself immediately because i was near tears already.
geez...was i that transparent? walking wounded for everybody to witness?
it was terribly embarrassing but i just consoled myself with the fact that she was, after all, a friend although not a close one, at least it was NOT one of his friends OR worse....HIM with current squeeze strolling hand in hand.
it was then that i made up my mind not to look like an emotional wreck again the next time i bump into someone familiar. i mean...who really cares if you're torn beyond repair inside? basic self-preservation cautions us that no matter how damaged you feel deep down... never to allow it to seep into the surface.
a true survivor may feel it.....but would rather not look it.
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