why is it important to let go of the old stuff and jump into newer things?
out with the old, in with the new, they say.
because letting go of my past no matter how daunting a task brings me closer to the future.
to a different me.
no more dwelling (at least not so much now)..
turn the page, change the channel.
turn-off the radio!! well, unless the music is really soothing and not senti.
my mantra every time i look in the mirror is this...
i look different. i feel different. i AM different now.
different does not mean i'm alone...different does not mean i feel empty.
different just means accepting change.
dive into different.
swim towards the new, improved Candy.
Showing posts with label breakup warrior. Show all posts
Showing posts with label breakup warrior. Show all posts
Saturday, July 28, 2007
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
Walking Wounded
i went to the bookstore today to lick my wounds with words of healing. after almost three hours of desperate browsing, i finally decided on the bible (yes, the bible since i need a new one as i can't understand the version i have), a prayerbook for everyday women, a book from Paolo Coehlo, two self-help books and a women's magazine...so far the biggest bookstore splurge of my life.
on my way to the counter, i saw a college friend and greeted her.
Candz, okay ka lang? Pumayat ka ah..
i then blurted out that i just broke up with my boyfriend and excused myself immediately because i was near tears already.
geez...was i that transparent? walking wounded for everybody to witness?
it was terribly embarrassing but i just consoled myself with the fact that she was, after all, a friend although not a close one, at least it was NOT one of his friends OR worse....HIM with current squeeze strolling hand in hand.
it was then that i made up my mind not to look like an emotional wreck again the next time i bump into someone familiar. i mean...who really cares if you're torn beyond repair inside? basic self-preservation cautions us that no matter how damaged you feel deep down... never to allow it to seep into the surface.
a true survivor may feel it.....but would rather not look it.
on my way to the counter, i saw a college friend and greeted her.
Candz, okay ka lang? Pumayat ka ah..
i then blurted out that i just broke up with my boyfriend and excused myself immediately because i was near tears already.
geez...was i that transparent? walking wounded for everybody to witness?
it was terribly embarrassing but i just consoled myself with the fact that she was, after all, a friend although not a close one, at least it was NOT one of his friends OR worse....HIM with current squeeze strolling hand in hand.
it was then that i made up my mind not to look like an emotional wreck again the next time i bump into someone familiar. i mean...who really cares if you're torn beyond repair inside? basic self-preservation cautions us that no matter how damaged you feel deep down... never to allow it to seep into the surface.
a true survivor may feel it.....but would rather not look it.
Monday, July 16, 2007
getting by...
i'm just going through the motions.
trying to push past the pain one day at a time.
each night i close my eyes to sleep as soon as tears stop flowing.
each day i open my eyes to wonder again why i wake up still.
someday i'll know the reason. someday i'll look back knowing i did the right thing.
until then..
i'm just going through the motions.
somehow finding the strength to go on.
trying to push past the pain one day at a time.
each night i close my eyes to sleep as soon as tears stop flowing.
each day i open my eyes to wonder again why i wake up still.
someday i'll know the reason. someday i'll look back knowing i did the right thing.
until then..
i'm just going through the motions.
somehow finding the strength to go on.
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